Holy Mackerel

I got the bad hottie, rocks enough ice to play hockey....

   Aren't they cute? He wore his best hat for that pic. I've seen Mako Sharks with smaller grins than Miss Moesha there. Goofing on her is OK, because she just got a ring that rocked 11.5 carats. That's about a million dollars, folks.

   San Quentin can afford it- he just signed with Phoenix for $42 mmmmmmmmillion. Jeweler Jason Arasheben spent a month designing it, much like Uma Thurman's sword in Kill Bill I. This craftmanship merely ends Q's single life, as opposed to the lives reduced to a Cambodia-like pile of limbs that Uma stacked up in that Japanese club. You can read all about it in Quentin's forthcoming autobiography, called:

" I, Q"

   For any young men reading this column, pretty much any girl is gonna scream, faint and jump on you like a wrestler if you put 11.5 carats on her finger. Even a Diva who used to have her own show on the WB. There isn't an equivalent act a woman can do for a man...unless she could turn into a pizza, a 12 pack and an NFL Sunday Ticket after lovemaking.

   An interesting sidebar: this adds prestige to the Clipper franchise. Playing in LA holds a certain charm for any young, single man. He'll be a rich stud at parties that Beyonce and Buffy and god knows who else will be at. Not much beats pulling your Ferrari up to a club, and having Jessica Alba hop out. NBA guys get girls in LA: at parties, they'll be a foot and a half taller than Tom Cruise. Check, please!

   The Lakers are a championship team, and have a certain air about them. The Clippers are kind of like their white trash cousins from the wrong side of the track. This marriage will show a potential free agent that he can indeed Score in Clipperland. Didn't Norm Nixon marry the girl from Fame, or something?

 

This could be you, kid....come to LA and hook up.