Chin Music

   I'm not as jacked and pumped for this year's Super Bowl as I was last year.

   This is understandable. I'm a very parochial fan. I already forgot who won this year's World Series. I wanna say the White Sox, but I could be wrong there.The baseball season ends for me when the Red Sox are eliminated, unless the World Series is particularly compelling for some reason.

   This year's Super Bowl would be a good regular season game, but there were many better games that could have been shook out of the NFL schedule. I'd loved to have seen the Pats in it again, but a lot of games would have beaten Seattle/Pittsburgh... a matchup that would doom the NBA Finals if Pitt had a team.

   Despite my distaste for the man, I'd have loved to see Peyton and Eli square off in some serious brother-vs-brother hatred. Pittsburgh and Philly would have been good, if someone could have gone out and got T.O. a white quarterback. I'd like to have seen Tomlinson or Vick fight it out to see who got the better of that draft-day trade a few years back. Chad Johnson would no doubt have been funny enough to fill 2 weeks of hype, and I kind of have a soft spot for the Bears (that Super Bowl in the 1980s meant nothing to me- when I was put to bed, it was 3-0, Patriots).

   I even like Pittsburgh. It's difficult not to. Is there anyone out there as Old School as Pittsburgh? I'd root for the Taliban if Bill Cowher and that mammoth, jutting chin of his were coaching them. Nothing says "football" more than a 250 pound running back up the middle, and have the Steelers ever had a bad defense?

   They even have an Angry Samoan, who hits like an iced bong- hard, and with the tendency to leave one relatively lightheaded afterwards. I'd try to spell his name, but I don't want him angry with me.

   Seattle is a nice story in themselves- a Cinderella story of guys getting absolutely no respect whatsoever, who somehow ended up playing when Mr. Chunky Soup and Mr. Five Layers Of Protection were off on vacation. They are well-coached, they run the ball well, and they've won all the important games they've had.

   Throw the Massachusetts QB (who I think I saw play when his Xaverian squad took on Duxbury High School) in with stopping Indianapolis' run at the consecutive wins record, and I should adore the guys.

   I don't. Something about Seattle evokes the phrase "also-ran" from me. Maybe it's their relative Cherry status insofar as battle-testedness goes. Maybe it's that no-name defense. Maybe it's the fact that Vegas didn't give them a chance of being here when they set the preseason odds... Vegas wasn't built on losing- at least not THEIR losing.

   I like to think that I'm not so shallow as to dislike a team because they have really ugly uniforms, but I'll admit that somehow (perhaps and most likely subliminally) those b-u-t-t uniforms could influence my betting on this contest. I wouldn't wear that rag of a jersey to a sh** fight.

   That said, it's the last legitimate football game until next September, and only the process of cooking (or a child-based problem, which I plan on attempting to minimize by running them ragged during the afternoon before the game) will take my eyes from the screen. Yes, there is a TV in the kitchen.

   The hype is fun. There is a proven chance that a celebrity will be stripped. Candice Michelle- a WWE diva who looks like she was put together in Hugh Hefner's Frankenstein lab- should have another GoDaddy commercial. The Rolling Stones concert should provide a fine opportunity to walk Sloppy Dog around the block. I have enough food to fatten Somalia.

   It's all good. As far as the game goes, the two teams seem to be pretty evenly matched. Forced to go to the bookie, my call is:

Pittsburgh, 23-20