propz

 

Hi!

Horn-tooting... another AOL interview for Stacey.... Redskins Behind Patriot Lines: Five [Plus One] Questions With An Enemy Blogger - FanHouse - AOL Sports Blog

I think that I have one more gig there... when the Dolphins turn up on the schedule again.... but enjoy that one while it's lasting.

 The Red Sox brought the ruckus last night,and now hold a 2-0 lead on the lookin'-overmatched Colorado Rockies. They might beat Dice K or something, but we can throw Beckett twice in 5 games, and that's pretty much going to be the World Series right there, folks.

 Colorado has fine skiing, and it's already snowing up that way. They'll be fine. Call me in 86 years, and see if I have any sympathy.

Pity is a funny thing. Only humans have it, and humans are very selective about when they use it. Peyton Manning doesn't know who I am and has never purposefully tried to harm me... but if I heard that he'd torn his knee up today, I'd be pleased.

Tearing up your knee hurts really, really badly... like wicked bad. It may make Manning cry, and even Rodney Harrisson won't call him a p****y over it. I'd wince as I watched the injury, just like a non-sociopath would.... but you'd be amazed how quickly my mind would shift into a whole other gear. "That's a whole season and the playoffs, easy... who's the backup?..... can Indy still win the division?.... has the trade deadline passed?.... possible wild card advancing now.....etc..." As the consequence of the injury set in, I may even crack a little smile..... although I'd make an effort not to let my daughters see me doing so.

I wouldn't be alone, either. Football is an ugly game, and injury is the reality. If Manning gets hurt, that's reality... and you have to deal with reality eventually. The time one wastes on pity is time taken away from preparation for the new reality. Allowing yourself a small chuckle is merely a device for defeating pity, which takes longer to exhibit than mirth does.

Anything can happen out there... which is why sports betting is so fun. It gives Manning- who actually looks like a decent enough gentleman- a chance to get back at me for laughing at his ACL injury, by beating the point spread and costing me my week's pay at the high school.

The best way to avoid letting Manning beat you by himself is to bet a lot of games. The best way to do that is to get a lot of help from your babysitter, as well as heeding what your bookmaker friend tells you. Between Elle, Abdullah and myself, we have brought you today's football picks:

 

NY Giants 21, Miami 17

Miami is in that fast-spin part of the slow swirl into the septic tank. At least they have a superb autumn climate. Last week Miami looked like my high school team at Duxbury looked when we'd go play a city team and get stomped on by all the klack girls.... 60 minutes of in-over-their-heads terror.

 

Oakland 14, Tennessee 13

This season, you have to pick teams that you don't like every now and then. Hence, the Raiders.

 

Philly 31, Minny 21

More than one team will be firing the scout who advised them to pass over freakish Minnesota tailback Adrian Peterson. The boy runs angry.... and he has a good reason to be angry, because the 21 points I pedicted equals him running wild all day, his QB-deficient offense failing to get into the end zone, and Minnesota having to kick 7 field goals.

 

St. Louis 34, Cleveland 28

St. Louis has to win some time, and a loss to an 0-7 team can be hidden easily enough among the other losses on Cleveland's 2007 resume. St. Louis QB Marc Bulger is actually, in a week-by-week basis, being pursued more doggedly than federal fugitive Whitey Bulger.

 

Chicago 14, Detroit 13

Detroit has been burning me all year, but I don't see them winning the requisite amount of these type of games that separate the 7-9s from the 10-6s.

 

Carolina 28, Indy 27

Someone will be looking ahead to New England/Indy... I choose Them.

 

Pittsburgh 21, Cincy 20

Both of these teams have looked ugly recently, but the bangles look uglier.

 

Jacksonville 10, Tampa 7

There may be better backyard football games in Florida that day, especially near UMiami.

 

NY Jets 20, Buffalo 19

Avid historian Belichick was actually gathering material for his The Sudden Rise And Fall Of The Mangina documentary that fateful/costly afternoon in September.

 

San Diego 24, Houston 14

If Sn Diego were a big Unit, their coach would be the Anti-Viagra. Call your doctor if you can't get a stiffy in 16 weeks. They can beat these clowns, though.

 

 New Orleans 28, San Francisco 7

I owe Pastor Sprague this much for that home run of a prayer he seems to have hit with the Big Guy in regards to the Red Sox. I should have him pray for my mutual funds.

 

 Green Bay 70, Denver 0

Fuh Colorado.

 

New England 38, Washington 21

21 of those 21 Redskin points will be scored against guys who are on the Patriot roster because Belichick owed their college coach a favor. If Tom Brady wanted to fu** your daughter, would you really stop him at this point?