Monday, April 23, 2007

Onward Through The Fog

 

I was at Choco-Latte in Sagamore the other day, just as the Sox and Yankees were firing up a three game series at Fenway. As I was trying to enjoy my gelato, someone came up to me and asked for directions to Falmouth.

Tourist season is just beginning, and I began to go instantly into that giving-directions mode all Cape residents operate in at times... when I saw that Yankees hat her husband was wearing. This flipped the script.

"You're almost there. Go back over that bridge (the Sagamore) up Route Three, get off at Exit Ten, take a right, then go about a mile." While fronting like I lived in Falmouth (not easy with my accent), I gave them directions which, if followed properly, took them to The Milepost Restararunt in Duxbury, Massachusetts. Of course I wrote it down for them.

For those of you not from Massachusetts, Duxbury is nowhere near Cape Cod... I probably took an hour- maybe two- out of their vacation. I'm glad I did.

Eff them. They should know better than to go out in public dressed like that. I certainly wouldn't walk through Hell's Kitchen in a Big Papi shirt.. and if I did, I'd deserve whatever happened to me. Maybe they got a nice lunch out of it, maybe not... I don't care.

Here's some Sox-related video for you to enjoy:

First, ESPN was nice enough to post video of us hitting not-two-not-three-but-four homers in a row off the Yankers Sunday. Check the steady long ballin'

ESPN.com - MLB - Recap

But wait...there's more. Watch someone interfere with a Fenway foul ball and get a pizza to the face for it. It's a few minutes into this video here:

Blog Show No. 5: 'No Gluing of Pubes Onto the Face'

Enjoy and remember this three game sweep of the Evil Empire that we just witnessed. Look back on it fondly when the September Swoon hits, about mid-August. Time has shown that the Yankees will prevail generally, so sit down and absolutely savor us whipping them like a government mule on a warm April weekend when hope seemed to seep out of the tree branches.

As for the family I saw at Choco-Latte.... I hope that they enjoyed Duxbury.

Since we have the topic out there....

- I don't deliberately mislead Rhode Islanders, NH, VT, Maine or western Mass people. I'd invite a fellow New Englander into my house to use MapQuest if I saw a B hat on them.

- When a car pulls up with Connecticut plates, I can tell just by looking at them if they root for the Sox or the Yankees. Connecticut Sox fans go to Falmouth, Connecticut Yankees go to Duxbury. Sox fans call this ability "Hatedar," and it is born-not-taught.

- No other state/team (except the Los Anglese Lakers, and Californians specifically have to be wearing Laker gear) elicits this response from me. Bulls, Bears, Bucks, Bengals, Brewers, Browns... I do the best I can for all of them.

- It's quite possible that they asked for directions in Duxbury, only to be answered by someone of like-me-mindedness (I grew up in Duxbury), who then sent them even further off into the hinterland. This could set them on a Bridgewater-Quincy-Maine-Alabama pattern that might even involve a "ferry" trip that ends in Le Havre (provided the marks run into an Ascended Master of my trade).

- If you're going to try to send Yankee fans to Canada.... remember to send them AROUND the state of New York. They might catch on, otherwise. I like to think that the ride through Maine will make them enjoy Quebec that much more.

I don't dislike tourists. I dislike Yankee fans. Sometimes, the Yankee fan is the tourist, and that's just how the cookie crumbles, folks. At worst, they learn a valuable life lesson... and knowledge is the gift that keeps on giving.

That's the pattern, and I'm sticking with it for the forseeable future. 
The Red Sox go to Yankee Stadium this weekend.... and I really could use some more Gelato.

 
Sick hockey goal... the kid looks like a lacrosse player
 
 
 

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm originally from NY and I'm a lifelong Yankee fan.  I also happen to live in Duxbury, so your blog popped up on my 'radar screen'.  
If you actually treated these tourists in this manner, it wouldn't surprise me for two reasons.  Boston fans act like school yard children who, who unable to deal with their own athletic and intellectual inadequacies, attack those children who excel.  It's called jealousy.  
New Englanders, especially those from Massachusetts, are characterized as cold, unhelpful and unfriendly.

Some Facts:
1) World Series: Yankees 26; Red Sox 5.  The Yankees are better than the Red Sox, get over it, just enjoy the game!
2) Your behaviour supports the second reason listed above.

In New York, we have fun with the competition in a good natured way.  The hatred that New Englanders show to the Yankees and often all New Yorkers, as you've demonstrated, is foreign to us.  However, it does illustrate the fact that Massachusetts, and in particular Boston, is becoming third rate and it's residents know it.
Stop any New Yorker on the street and ask for directions, and he'll genuinely go out of his way to help, even if you're wearing a Red Sox hat.
So, keep up the hatred and the school boy antics, and help continue Massachusett's decline.  When you do finally retire, and likely head south and live amongst truly friendly people, perhaps you'll wake up and realize how pathetic you've been.  

Anonymous said...

My God... someone finally mounted the "New York City is friendlier than your city" argument. Look for President Tyson in 2012 or so.

Anonymous said...

Hey, I was just gonna say I like the screen name and the anecdote. That Yankee fan posting, inherently proves their egotistical arrogance, as they live in the past. I grew up in Hanson, MA which is very close to Deluxebury, but now live in the state of New York, and I can attest that Yankees fans, for the most part, here, don't know anything about anything and prove much more ignorant than I, a loyal member of Sawx Nation since birth. Sorry for the run-on sentence. And the argument giving us the number of rings is so irrelevant. The Celtics have 16 World Championships, but I don't throw that in anyone's face, because it makes no sense to do so. I lived in New York for 12 years now and it's amazing how when I first got here there was so many fewer Yankees fans. Bandwagon, anyone? But rest assured, they're on the decline. Keep up the good direction giving.

Anonymous said...

wow greta entry Green Dragon! go Red Sox
love,natalie