Wednesday, August 10, 2005

20k Contest

 

We're nearing 20,000 hits here, and it's time for a contest.

Whoever ends up being the 20,000th visitor here gets a free present from the High Above Courtside offices.

I'm always on, so just hit me off when you roll that sucker over to twenty grand, and we can settle the business in IM.

If I'm the 20,000th, I'll just hook myself up.

Good luck!

 

You'll be able to choose from one of these fabulous prizes....recently edited for an all-AOL approach that keeps you from having to give your address to some freak on the Internet.

- a page from Stacey Monponsett's long-awaited S+M novel  Arf, She Said

- a virtual dip into Stacey's prized "Worst Essays Ever Turned In To Me" collection....name of student removed, of course.

- (MAYBE) a picture of Shock and Awe, the Two Minute Warning Cheerleaders....I'm saying  "maybe" because:

A) I haven't asked them yet

B) I know Shock can kick my ass, and it doesn't look too good with Awe, either.

- Stacey's new poem, sent to your email. The poem is called Stop Snitching.

- for one quarter hour, Stacey will make up a screen name :  "(Your Name Here)'s #1 Fan," and follow you into chatrooms.

- an email with 20 absolutely random picks from Stacey's bookmarks.

- Stacey will write an insane letter to Dr. Paul Zimmerman at Sports Illustrated, demanding his vote on your behalf in the NFL Hall of Fame elections next year.

- For one week, Stacey will advertise your small business in her profile.

- At one point during the school year, Stacey will help your children(through the IM of a legal guardian only) with any History paper they might have due.

- In one IM session, Stacey will teach you enough French to get a bartender's attention in Quebec.

- You'll get an email with 10 of Stacey's favorite recipes...and remember, girls.....Stacey has a 270 pound husband.

- brief tips about how to kill with your hands, via email, gleaned from Stacey's time in the Mossad in the late 1990s.

 

 

 

The best part about High Above Courtside is that it is the only AOL Journal where you can get recipes, sports, homework help, S+M,and tips about how to kill with your thumb.

 

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

19603 right now.

Anonymous said...

I cant remember when, in two marriges, I wasnt abused ,Went from one to anther ( of course not knowing) It couldnt be just a slap..... but down right ABUSE, kicked,punched,spit on ,fractured arm ( and thats when I was pregant with my second baby.... the first was only 2 yrs old ) With both it was as if they wore masks.. different identies,I didnt know these people .the ANGER,RAGE,The Horror,The unspeakable,In my family..............After all that, my health started ! If It wasnt one thing it was onther, I went from 17 with Tonsills removed,with my first baby .......an un-inspected C-Section, to having to have anther 2yrs later.
        Back-Sergery- hysterrectomy ( Tatal ) to, neck surgery Then 4wks later I was in a car accident , which at that point ai had found out .I had,had M.S
       Terrified, crying ,dont remember HOW I had reached home from the Hospital
I had went through series of tests. dont till this day HOW !!!!!!!!!!!! I at the time didnt know what M.S. was what it would do to me. I just knew I couldnt stop crying for weeks .......... and that was 10 yrs ago the 15th this mth. My body has deminissed terribaly..... my whole left lobe of my brain is damaged , thats my eyes,sight,speech,memory,cordination,seizers,50% of my eye sight has been permentaly damaged.I have a 10 mth old Grandson I cant even keep all the time because my arms and legs are in the worse pain I could ever imagine/ I just turned 42.......... most of the time I dont know what to do nor what I will do ... to tell the pain Im in the only thing that puts a dent in it is oxycontin......and that does not do the trick .All I want to know is what next,I cant take any more, OH GEE HOW COULD I FORGET ......I was just told I have diabeties... LOL.LOL.LOL.NOW I ASK MYSELF , WHAT NOW !!!!!!!!!!!

                 AND I ASK MYSELF , Why am I such a magnet to A___ Holes ???????
    &

Anonymous said...

Hell....she wins SOMETHING for that.

I suppose a few Abusive Marrige tips from my Mossad training would be right up her alley.

I hit my husband all the time, but there is such a size difference there that it's almost comical. Shea has hit him a few worse than I have, in an episode involving a ice cream Sundae, a door, a going into labor false alarm, and a 270 pound man running as fast as he can. I'd tell the story now, but it's a definite journal entry, as soon as I can tie it in to something sporty.

Lady....if I were you.....I'd take my beating like a soldier....then, when he's asleep, I'd empty the bank account.... and then geld him with a straight edge razor. It sounds heavy, but he is gonna kill you one of these days. Lorena Bobbitt walked, remember.

While I've never castrated anyone, I've spent enough time in Farm Country to know that the key is not to waver. Grab, pull taut, and WHACKO.....one solid thrust. There's no bone there.....it's like cutting through a bratwurst. Message Sent.

If you lack the intestinal fortitude to do THAT, it would be a good move to just pack your bags and get down to the battered women's shelter.

Try this page....and get away from that piece of merde that you married, before he kills you:

http://www.ehow.com/how_8640_find-battered-womens.html




Anonymous said...

jesus, how did we go from a hit counter to spouse abuse????
I agree, she deserves some sort of award, like divorce papers.

Well, I read the prize list for the contest, and I'm all over this...I think.

I would really love the recipes, if Yannis doesn't get that too. That said, I would recommend going ahead and having two prizes. One for Yannis, and the other for the rest of man/womankind.

Actually and seriously, this should be fun. Some advertising would be a hoot. Can't wait to see who wins, but I wonder if it's preordained?

Lew  

Anonymous said...

i HATE SPAN

Anonymous said...

Look Lew, I won the rookie of the week and the month and have been on SBL only two times, which I was asked to go on. Why do you feel the need to go on and talk about me on other blogs? There is no clique that is leaving you out of stuff, there's no money, there's no conspiracy. I really don't know why you're acting like this..

Anonymous said...

Shucks, this is only 19,996 :>(

Anonymous said...

I'm still trying to decide whether winning would be a good thing or a bad thing.

Anonymous said...

Stacey,
Hey I am new at the blog thing. I was wondering if you could give me so help. I like doing it because I have a lot to talk about and alot of people think it is funny stuff. Anyway, they are just my random thoughs as I get them when I can. I have alot to say and alot of stories to tell. I am definitely not afraid of controversy or criticism. Anyhow.. Let me know if you can! Thanks!


Anonymous said...

Awww, man, I'm 20,187.  Always nice to stop by your journal.  Girl you are so funny!  Love that response from the winner (suckers) in the photo!  Too funneeeee!  I'm sure if I keep hanging around your journal I'll learn to cook and rule my roost even more... a dreaded thing since everything has to have a place here and a time-- and I all ready drive the family nuts keeping everyone on schedule and organized as possible.  You can always tell if I'm having a bad week because then everyone else does too.  The cream puffs look dangerous.  Hugs,
Lisa