Not a lot of people know this, but Michael Jordan once put on a hood and infiltrated a Ku Klux Klan meeting to win a $100,000 bet with Charles Barkley. Think that's bad? Maria Sharapova was a former WOW wrestler, competing under a mask as "Easy Girl." What's worse is that Barry Sanders retired young, changed his name, underwent radical plastic surgery, and now competes in the World Series of Poker as "Miami John Cernuto," a 40 year old looking white guy.
Never heard these stories before? Good. I just made them up. But I just started the timer, and I wouldn't be surprised if someone tells me one of these stories in a year or two- swearing they have a friend who is Sharapova's agent's cousin's girlfriend.
Welcome to Urban Legends. "Candyman." "Bloody Mary." "Death by Pop Rocks." "AOL will pay for some kid's cancer therapy if he gets 1 million emails sent out." "Woman killed in bizarre gang ritual." You've all heard a few of them, but you may not be aware of the ones that land in our realm, the world of sports.
Sports are just a big mirror held up to society, and we shouldn't be shocked when an athlete ends up as a subject in an urban legend. 99% of them are Bull Hockey, as Col. Potter used to say. That should take none of the fun out of it.
Here's the best I found. Props to www.Snopes.com. They did the work, I just change the words and pretend I did.
Try to guess which is true, and which is false....I'll clue you in on what's what at the end of the piece. Here we go:
- Fidel Castro had a tryout for the Washington Senators.
- Doc Ellis pitched a no-hitter while on LSD.
- The Baby Ruth candy bar was not named after the famous slugger, but after Grover Cleveland's daughter.
- Abbott and Costello are in the Baseball Hall of Fame.
- The film Back To The Future II, made in 1989, correctly predicts the outcome of the 1997 World Series.
- Billy Ripken has profanity on his 1989 baseball card.
- Gaylord Perry was once told he would hit a home run "when a man walks on the moon." Perry hit his first homer minutes after the moon landing.
- Chelsea Clinton disguised her appearance and competed in the 1996 Olympics as a Tae Kwon Do flyweight.
- Football players can be cursed by appearing on the cover of Sports Illustrated or on a Chunky Soup commercial.
- The area code for Buffalo is 044, as in o-for-four in Super Bowls.
- A bad call in a NFC title game led to Fran Tarkenton's father suffering a fatal heart attack.
- Eric Lindros lost a bar fight to figure skater Elvis Stoyko.
- A soccer team wins a tournament berth by scoring on itself.
- A soccer game precipitated a Central America war.
- Golf courses have 18 holes because a bottle of scotch has 18 shots.
- New York's sewage system backed up due to extensive use during a Super Bowl half-time.
- Lee Trevino was hit by lightning while golfing.
- 66% of avacados sold in the US are sold on Super Bowl Sunday, and the week preceding it.
- And the best one.....Cal Ripken beat Kevin Costner after catching him in bed with Mrs Ripken.
Let's go through them....rumor by juicy rumor.
- Castro never had a tryout. The only record of him even playing was an "F Castro" who appeared in an intramural game at Havana Law School, or something.
- Doc indeed did throw a no-no while tripping. He took the LSD on what he thought was an off day, only to be informed he was scheduled to pitch that day. He said that "sometimes the ball was small, and sometimes it was big." I thought I was a rebel when I smoked weed before my soccer games. Doc was the Alice in Chains concert to my Rugrats episode.
There's a Suburban Legend version of this story with a varsity hockey goalie at Duxbury High School.
- This one is tricky. The company who made the candy bar claimed it was named after Miss Cleveland. Ruth Cleveland was adored by the nation when she became the first child born to a sitting president, and she was indeed known as "Baby Ruth". Ruth dies in 1904, 17 years before the candy bar was introduced.
In 1921, the Baby Ruth bar debuts, just about the time that a certain NY slugger rose to prominence. Babe didn't like this unpaid take on his name, and lent his name legally to the "Babe Ruth Home Run Bar," which never caught on.
In order to beat a lawsuit, the candymakers put out the Ruth Cleveland story, adding that she visited the candy factory in 1906 and asked that a bar be named after her. Unfortuntely, Ruth Cleveland died in 1904, and the idea that a candy bar is named after a moldering dead woman is morbid at best. Even the company itself was not founded till 1921.
Babe himself may have gained his nickname from Miss Cleveland, but that is a story for another post.
- Bud and Lou are not personally in the Hall of Fame, but there is an exhibit there that features their legendary "Who's on first?" routine.
- Sorta kinda false. BTTFII featured a scene where Mike Fox is in 2015, and sees a sports report that Chicago beat Miami in the World Series. The 1997 series was won by Florida. If you don't believe me, check this link:
Video clip from Back to the Future II
- Billy Ripken, unknowingly, posed for his Topps baseball card with a profanity on his bat, which was scribbled there by a teammate.
The profanity was later edited out by the cardmaker. I made it this small on purpose, but the profanity sounds a little like "Truck Lace", and refers to Ripken's visage, as we French like to say. If you can't see the picture, know that I tried pasting it in here 10 times before I gave up.
Billy is only in 2nd place in Ripken Family myths, though. We'll finish that family later.
- Besides walking around with the name "Gaylord",Mr Perry did indeed bash said home run only moments after the Apollo 11 moon landing. The quote was attributed to manager Alvin Dark.
This mirrors the Neil Armstrong story. A great false legend attributed to Armstrong says that as he walked on the moon, he made a remark, "Good luck, Mr. Gorsky." Most people thought he was taunting a cosmonaut, until records showed no space-type people by that name. Armstrong finally cracked, and told this story:
As a kid, Neil chased a baseball into a neighbor's yard. Mr. Gorsky's yard, to be exact. He was then privy to an argument between Mr. and Mrs. Gorsky that ended with Mrs. Gorsky saying that she would provide a "happy ending" for Mr. Gorsky when "the kid next door walks on the moon."
Here's a link to the Apollo 11 transcripts, if you don't buy what I'm telling ya. The story is bunk.
- I made the Chelsea one up myself.
- Teams have won the Big Game after showing up on the SI cover, but enough Bad Karma exists to keep the legend alive. Here's a link to a SI site that can tell you better than I can:
http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/features/cover/2002/jinx/main/
Chunky Soup just started doing athlete endorsement commercials recently. Kurt Warner saw his career fall apart in a jiffy after he did his ad. Jerome Bettis has been oft-injured since he sold soup. Donovan McNabb never won the big game.
If Tom Brady tries to do a Chunky ad, see if I don't personally stop him.
- Buffalo has an area code of 716.
- Fran's father was stricken during the 3rd quarter, not during the 4th quarter. It was during the 4th Q that Drew Pearson caught a ball out of bounds, only to have a ref rule he was shoved out. I'm sure some Minnesota guy had a cardiac over it.
- The Stojko/Lindros fight never happened. Elvis once heard a girl tell him she saw it. He just laughed. Elvis supposedly does have a black belt, but he and Lindros are actually close friends.
- A tie game in a particular soccer tournament resulted in a 2-0 score being awarded if one team were able to get a lead in penalty kicks.
Once upon a time, a team needed 2 points to advance in the tournament. Late in the game, they were up, 2-1. Realizing they probably wouldn't score another goal, they (Barbados) elected to score in their own net. Grenada then tried to "even" the score by scoring in their net, but Barbados defended the opponent's goal admirably. They won the shootout, and advanced...shadily, by a 2-0 score. This was the second craziest soccer story ever...
- Exisiting tensions between El Salvador and Honduras were heightened by rioting that happened after a soccer game in 1969. Shortly after the game, the Salvadoran Army invaded Honduras, and 3000 died in the fighting.
- The famed St. Andrews golf course in Scotland had 18 holes when the rules of golf were formed, and served as the standard. Even St. Andrews was formed from a merger of 2 courses. It had nothing to do with flasks.
- The sewer system backup story has never been confirmed by any city's government. Salt Lake City had a water main break during 1984's Super Bowl, but they were having them before and after the SB. They had bad plumbing, and it all fell apart. Similar stories exist about the final episode of M.A.S.H. and Amos and Andy.
- Lee Trevino was nearly hit by lightning while competing in 1975, and was seriously injured. He was using a one iron for a shot, and a lightning bolt split a tree in half next to him. He is said to have uttered, "Even God can't hit a one iron."
- The Super Bowl week uses 5 percent of the annual US avacado haul, not the huge estimates given off every year by the dip makers, or whatever you call them.
- The Cal Ripken story may be the greatest celebrity rumor ever, except for that one about Richard Gere and the gerbil.
Ripken and Kevin Costner had met during the Bull Durham filming, or something. They became friends, and Costner stayed at Ripken's house while filming his 1997 bomb, The Postman. This was also when Cal was chasing Lou Gehrig's streak.
This is where nothing happened. Ripken denies it, Costner has threatened to harm radio hosts who mention it. Reporters confirmed that Ripken was at the field. The rumor is absolutely false. I'm too poor to sue. So, here we go........
Rumor Style, of course....
Cal leaves for a game, forgets something, goes back to his house, and finds his wife Dancing With Wolves, so to speak. Cal goes all Postman on him, and is so distraught, he calls in sick. The Orioles suddenly had a lighting malfunction, the game was postponed, and the Streak lived on.
The electrical problem was real, as Camden Yards is on a relatively new power grid, separate from the rest of the city. They had problems before, and that night, the lights behind home plate were out. Randy Johnson was scheduled to be on the mound, throwing 95mph into shadows. Fans and reporters recall Cal at the park, ready to play...which means this juicy story is, sadly(or happily), Bull Hockey.
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