Soccer Moms, George II, and Shopping For Me

Dear Monponsett,

   My son has yet to play the position that he loves in soccer . The season is over and yet he is greatly dissapointed in how the coach didn't let him play his position- only midfield. A long game away the coach yelled at him to clean up everyone else's mess and he wasn't allowed ot play.

We dont want him to give up the sport, but it might happen. Thoughts?

- Nat

Dear Nat,

   Midfield is an important position in soccer. The person in that spot is sort of the General of the team... in charge of bringing the ball up, and in charge of leading the defense when the ball comes the other way.

   If the coach even raised his/her voice at my daughter during what I gather is a friendly recreational soccer league, I would have walked down onto the field, stopped the game, and took her away from this Freak immediately. If my husband was with me, the coach would most likely be physically assaulted. I would definitely file a complaint with the league.

   A lot of coaches come from the Player side of the ball, and athletes aren't the most sensitive people in the world. They are more likely to bark at someone for nothing, and they are more likely to single out a kid for some sort of cruel hazing that seems to make perfect sense to them. Basically... a bully.       

   In fairness to the coach.... he may see great talent in your son, and is riding him extra hard to try and make a complete player out of him.

   Most likely though... he's probably just some sort of neo-fascist third leg of a man who forgot somewhere along the line that soccer is supposed to be FUN... especially for the Wee.

   I coached a HS basketball team that went 1-16 for two years in a row (it wasn't my fault- we had 20 kids in the whole school). We took some fairly terrible beatings in our time, and many were difficult to watch. I repeatedly saw my kids forget to do stuff I had just told them to do. It does get upsetting, I'll admit.

   Still... I never once used words like "disappointed" with them (unless there had been a fight), and I never raised my voice to anyone who wasn't like 50 feet away from me.

   Other than cases involving:  

a) a money bet on the game  

b) something terribly shady, like a fight or the use of a racial slur.  

c) a bear coming out on the field, and sneaking up on an unsuspecting player  

d) an injury to the coach himself      

 ....NO coach should ever raise his voice at a recreation soccer game.  

- Stacey  

PS...    My husband just got up, and asked me what I was writing. When I told him, he said, "I'd have given that coach one really loud warning from the stands, and then I would have gone down there on the field and grabbed him around the neck. Bullies often only understand bullying."       

And he's the calm one....  

Other Vote

Date: 10/20/2005

2:08:38 AM Eastern Standard Time

From: JoesZ

Reply To: To: Monponsett

Yep the other Bush son might just get my vote to. Ivoted for George W. and I am quite satisfied with his leadership. For your information gas is the only thing that has stayed low in this Country for years. Over the last 40 years gas has only had an average increase of some 3.7%. Gas is now catching up with time so don't cry to George W. over it. It has been predicted and said for years it would eventually go to $5 a gal. so happy driving Liberal buddy.     

   I occasionally veer into political blogging... although I usually do it more in comment form at The Daily Pulse (Join In and Shape the News) blog, and occasionally John Scalzi's By The Way ( By The Way...) blog.   It's really a lot of fun if you like to write.

   This week we talked about:  

  

- David Stern Being Upset As He Finally Realizes That His 90% Black NBA Doesn't Dress Like A  50something Rich White Guy Thinks They Should.

- Is George II responsible For Hundreds Of Murders For Putting Party Hacks In Charge Of FEMA ...I  Mean, They're Charging That Bus Driver In Houston With Negligent Homicide, no?  

- If I Won The Powerball Lottery, I Would Spend On Armaments, And Try To Take Over Burkina-Faso Or The Ivory Coast.  

- Has Bush Murdered More Iraqis Than Saddam Did?  

- Save The Wishy-Washy Stuff, And Just Try To Force Billy Graham Onto The Supreme Court.

   OK... in fairness to the Daily Pulse blog, the titles were a little more-even handed than I'm letting on. They were simply asking for AOL readers to give their opinions, and I have a lot of free time in the morning.

   Still, my views fall on the extreme side. I'm not remotely liberal- a lot of my ideas border on Evil.   I think that if we're killing Mesopotamians, we should at least get some cheap/free oil out of it... and we should also smash Iran while we're over there. We're gonna have to do it eventually, anyhow...

   I think that no one in charge of Oil Companies should be running this country, ever. Too much conflict of interest exists. Bread and milk aren't poised to quadruple in price since 2001... gas is.  

   For that fact alone, Bush should resign.... and I think that the Red States that put this despicable oil whore into office (twice) have added another sorry chapter to their history.

    I get a lot of Harvard guys like Joe in the letter above popping up in my emails... people who fail to understand my essence.

   Joe is doing what he thinks is right- sticking up for what he believes in. I goofed on him in my replies, but I bear the man no grudge. Hell, I could be the one who is wrong... it happened, once.

   Still... I get the feeling that Joe could go to a GOP fundraising dinner, be served a nice steaming plate of feces... and even if he threw it up after, he'd compliment the chef and ask for seconds.  

   And the sad part is that this kind of person seems to make up a majority of the voters... well, except for Bush II's first win, which reminds me of the old Harry Truman quote:  

   "The election in your state was run in as low a manner as I've ever seen or even IMAGINED, and I've been in this game since 1905."  

 

  - Dear Stacey....nice picks this week (2-6) Do you even WATCH these sports???

   If all goes well, I should have cable TV today.  

   A small confession: I've been writing this column for quite some time without ever having watched sporting events that were on cable. I'll see games on at the local tavern, or go to a friend's house where the game is on.... but other than that, my main sports fix is WEEI-AM 850 or the Cape Cod channel that picks up the broadcasts.

   We're not poor, either. I've just always been a bookworm, and the TV is usually running some sort of Disney video if it's on at all. Stephen will watch the news or the Patriots game... but he mostly fixes stuff during his free time, or plays basketball.

   People look at us like we're crazy (hehe) when we say we don't have cable... especially where I serve Quail for dinner now and then. I operate outside of the accepted idyll.

   We have 5 TVs (we got all the gear when the family house sold), including one in the kitchen that I currently have potpourri sitting on. The house overlooks the bay, high on a hill.  I was raised in the wealthiest town in Massachusetts. Stephen and I have about 12 years of college between us, and even the baby is showing Snobbish tendencies.

   I'm pretty easy to please, but tough to shop for... if that makes any sense.

   Electronics intimidate me. The newspapers, an occasional show, and AOL are pretty much all the broadcasting I need... and this column (and the columns I enjoy visiting) take up most of my free time. I don't really wear jewelry, I dress modestly, I refuse to fly, I love my current Jeep too much to get rid of it, I fell asleep at Miss Saigon, I have too many pets and stuffed animals already, and I hate crowds.

   I've asked for a basketball before, when I was 26 years old. The CIA estimates that this has never happened before. I've also asked for a Lebron shirt, a computer WWE game, and a flanking pair of little lighthouses that run off solar power for the walkway.

   Sloppy Dog was a birthday gift, as was Tippy Turtle. I'm pretty sure that Melissa was conceived during a gift vacation we took to a cabin in New Hampshire. This year, I had asked for a little thingy that goes up on the roof, wires down onto my desk, and tells me how fast the wind is blowing. It's already operative. Things work themselves out, mostly.

   I usually get what I want, too. I've learned to forego surprise in return for satisfaction... and I will basically tell people what I want, where to get it, how much to pay for it, and - quite often- how to present it to me (as with the anenometer... I was pretty specific about wanting to come home some time to find it installed already).

   When discussing what to get me for Xmas, I've seen my husbandsteal a glance at my sister, who I'm pretty sure mouthed the phrase, "Give me the money, and I'll get it this weekend"  back to him. I was going to complain, but I could see that he was simply aiming for my complete satisfaction... and short ofjust giving me money for Christmas (which I would accept without complaint), hiring my basic genetic equivalent to shop for me is the best way to meet that goal.

  It (especially as Shea and I usually shop together, leading to a scenario where I basically shop for myself with someone else's money... but where I can't wear/use/play with what I get until either mid-October or late December) works.

   So, I have pretty much everything I need already... and whereas I shop so damned well myself, I require nothing more than a nice dinner out and a trip to somewhere that French is spoken to pretty much keep me walking on air till Christmas.

 

   It's a good gig for a husband. I'm sure many people reading this have been torn to shreds by their wives/husbands/family for coming up with some reallllllll shifty gifty at some point in their lives... when they had to buy something for someone, and had no idea what to get.

   I'm the opposite of that- one of my few Good traits. If I don't get what I want, I'll just go buy it myself. I'm generally pretty happy that someone took the time to do something nice for me, and if the present is good.... Gravy.

   Still, I had to ask for SOMETHING for my birthday, so I figured what the hey? Get some cable... it makes me a better person.

   For those of you who think that I'm intelligent, ask me about Seinfeld  or Survivor  or Sopranos  or Sarah Jessica Parker's show sometime. See if I don't shrug, and try to change the subject. This lack of Pop Culture Training hurts more than you'd think it would:

- Beth..."If you don't have HBO by Thansgiving, I can't even talk to you anymore. I'll eat dinner at the friggin' Sheraton."

(Beth and I are both Vivi Award Nominees,,,,Sportz, Jersey and other HAC friends, too)

- Treesoup-..."You've never watched Survivor?"

Me- "Nope. What's it about?"

"There's a bunch of people stranded on an island, and they have to survive day by day."

"Ohhhhh....I saw that....Why doesn't the Professor just fix the hole in the boat?"

 

- Jamie... A nice guy, Jamie.... getting himself a really huge break when asked to appear on Cold Pizza, which is some sort of ESPN show.

 

  Jamie has always treated me well in our dealings, and you'd think that I'd have the decency to flick on a simple device and see- sorta live- something go well for someone I think highly of.

   Nope. Until I asked Tammy...when Jamie said "I'll be on Cold Pizza next week,"  I assumed his wife had thrown him out.

   Tammy, you may remember, is my hippy friend who once asked me- during the Pats/Carolina Super Bowl- why players don't just run behind all the guys standing on the sidelines. I don't like to have to defer to her for anything sports-related, so I have decided to join the rest of you in 2005 by getting cable.

   I may come to terms with the Microwave Oven next. I did get the X-Box to work, and am no longer frightened by it.