Things overheard from Denver during the NBA All Star Break

 

- "God damn it if this aint the Black Woodstock!!"

- "If you count the undercover detectives following me, I actually have a bigger posse than Nelly."

- "Is renting one room on the 25th floor better for one's status than renting the entire 20th floor?"

- "Thirty minutes after the Yao Ming party, I was hungry again."

- "Three guys died during the Old Timer's Game practice, so we invented the 3 on 3 Ladies Challenge."

- "I'm telling you, Mr. President.....one nuke here, and you'll destroy the entire hip hop culture....you'll go to Harlem, and they'll be listening to The Charlie Daniels Band.....so what if we lose Denver"

- "Wow....an avalanche could hit the suburbs of this town, and they'd get $25-30 in federal relief aid."

- "Hey Mr. Ming...I left my hat on Pike's Peak....wanna reach up there and grab it?"

- "I'll have the Kobe Bryant Suite, please."

- "Even my entourage travels with its' own entourage."

- "I don't care what hotel chain you represent....we sold out of nine foot long beds months ago."

- "The shooting of Tim Duncan shows the danger of large men trying to ski in fur parkas....once they get into the countryside, the hicks shoot them for the Sasquatch bounty."

- "Yo...why aint this beer guy holding no O.E. or some St. Ides?"

- "I would recommend a nice Schlitz Malt Liqour with the Cornish Game Hen, Sir."

- "My God! Dunk Contest participant Josh Smith seems to have hung himself off the rim with his own chain"

- "That Master P rendition of God Bless America made me cry so hard, my pimp hat fell off my head."

- "When the record label drops us, we should definitely come back here to burglarize."

- "Man...this crowd looks whiter than our floor at the Denver Hyatt-Regency."

- "I'll be comping anyone from South Park Regional High School who wishes to attend my after party."

- "What do you mean, Proper Dress Required ?  Do you have any idea how much a pair of kiwi/purple Throwback Jordan Nikes be costin'??"

- "When coach takes us out, we should run into the stands and attack Ron Artest."

- "Why, that IS an Olympic Bronze medal in my pocket.....and  I'm happy to see you."

- "I got bumped up to First Class pronto when I flew here from Daytona"

- "Man....if Frank Layden tripped up here, he'd roll straight to New Mexico."

- "They should have the game next year somewhere colder, with more snow."

- "So I'm at the ATM, and this dude in a ski mask comes up behind me...it was long after I got my posse off him that I discovered he was actually the village minister."

- "A lot of great hip-hop acts came out of Denver....OK, I'm kidding, but the skiing can't be beat."

- Shaq has the shoe phone....but wait till the press sees my Jock Strap Phone..."

- "Nobody make any sudden moves until Mr. Iverson has removed his overcoat."

- "Monsieur Iverson....at this cafe, all customers go through a metal detector"

"I went to a basketball game,and the Black Oscars happened!"

- "I saw Marv Albert's dentition signature on my escort service girl"

= "Hey LeBron....we'd like you to do a quick 'Stay In School' ad for us"