Red Auerbach turns 87 today. He is basketball's true Lord of the Rings. No one else is even close. Phil Jackson is a punk. Air Jordan is an arriviste. Jerry West has a lot of catching up to do. Red probably coached LeBron's grandfather.
Red was a high school gym teacher, and was in the service for a while. Then he got into basketball, eventually ending up with the Celtics in 1950, after 4 years coaching Washington and Tri-Cities. He walked into Boston, set up shop, and then whipped everyone else around him.
From 1956-1986, the Celtics won 16 titles...basically one overy other year, although they took 8 straight at one point. Red was a brilliant, innovative coach. He was a master motivator. No one could fade him.
He wasn't tied to one player. He built a team around Cousy, then concocted a masterpiece when he angled to get Bill Russell. He added Heinsohns, Havliceks, Jones boys, Satches, Nelsons(when showing his retired Celtic number to the Warriors team he coached, Don Nelson swears that Mitch Richmond looked at him and said "Coach...you played?"), Sharmans, Luscotoffs and whoever else he needed.
When that bunch retired, he gets a Cowens, Jo Jo and Silas to play around Havlicek. When the wheels fall off that bunch, he builds the Bird team.
Even as he aged, he owned the other front offices like Dolemite.
The "Big Three" of Parish, McHale and Bird were all stolen from other teams. Parish and McHale were stolen from Golden State for Joe Barry Carroll and some dude who was out of the NBA in a contract. Bird was taken with a draft pick ganked from the Lakers for an aging Charlie Scott. DJ was traded for Rick Robey, straight up. Ainge was a second rounder. Cedric Maxwell was a small college steal, and was turned into Bill Walton when the time came.
2 other monster draft picks- Len Bias and Reggie Lewis- died, and only their deaths kept the Celtics from being a Player in the 1990s, as well. Reggie was a 23rd pick scoring 20ppg, and Bias was a Beast. Alas...
Red was sort of Florida-ized when Dick Pitino's ego came to town, and the Celtics have never recovered from it. Red works out of Washington these days, and Danny and Doc are worse for it. Both of them could use a bit of time bouncing on Arnold's knee, so to speak.
In fact, they should assume The Legacy, whether they want it or not.
D and D should both have involuntary surgery, where a radio transmitter is implanted into their craniums, near the frontal lobes. Red- who can still play Handball, and bangs down 4 or 5 Cubans a day- should be kept alive with huge amounts of amphetamines and stuff, and surrounded by TV screens showing NBA games and tapes of potential draftees.
Red will control input into Ainge and Rivers' radio transmitters, and can speak directly into the skulls of each man whenever the urge to do so strikes him. The volume will be in direct proportion to Red's blood pressure. He can be either a fleeting thought, or a terrifying, involuntary bladder-releasing howl...depending on how upset he is at whoever Ainge is trading for.
Had this device been in place when the Raef LaFrenz deal was made, Ainge's head would have exploded like a Daisy Cutter.
I'd also look into the Occult- the village of Salem is just up the road- and see if there could be Mojo worked that would let Red haunt the Celtic offices after his passing. I'd also like to have him signed for a few paranormal Fleet Center appearances...but only when the occasion truly merits it....and I'd keep him away from the dance team.
4 comments:
Red Auerbach was accomplished no question and his achievements are legendary....however, and this is a big however, I wonder what he would accomplish in the era of free agents and the big bucks of today. When Red was coaching he could rule with an iron fist because he had one. His word was law and he could treat the players however he wanted because he was in the drivers seat. It's not the same today. There are many, many egos in the game with equally as many highly talented players. How does he handle a player who has been designated the franchise player and who, like Kobe, could be have the coach be the first one to go in a power play? How does he handle it when players have a lot of demand in the market place and are free to go where they choose rather than being compelled to stay with their team because the contracts were tighter then. How does he handle it when the competition level is Everest's above what his team had to compete with and what is normal today for a team even at the lowest level would probably regularly open up a can of whup ass on the teams he coached?
The message for me is that he was masterful for the era he was in...head and shoulders above everyone else in that era...and there are masters in each era....the inaccurate assumption is that the challenges of a particular era are the same throughout time and that if one person thrives in that era, they would automatically thrive in another. Not true no matter how much people would like it to be. I say, give the masters of their era their due. Respect them for the period they were masters of and give up the "for all time" debate because the strengths of one era aren't necessarily the best ones for the next.
How to play winning basketball will never change - putting together a team that knows how to play together, unselfishly, and hustle is something that Red Auerbach could do in any era (he proved it in the 1950s, 1960s, 1970s, and 1980s). His ability to acquire the right players to play the game the right way and his knowledge of the right way are timeless. Happy Birthday Red. May you live to 120. Andrew L
Nicely written Monponsett, good subject matter/occasion. Good previous comments too. Happy Birthday Red.
I'd buy Yocoach's theory, except that Red was a coach. Whatever differences exist between today and yesterday's games, Red was able to dominate the field in the 50s through the 80s. Only cocaine kept him from having a big chunk of the 90s, too.
Players are different in today's game, but we can't assume that Red would have to beat Jordan, Shaq and their like with Bob Cousy and Bob Petit. Red would enter a 2004 game with 2004 talent, and the playing field would be tipped in his favor.
Check Red's career for proof. Red's teams had frustrated Wilt and Willis. When Russell retired, Red built a team that spent the 70s beating Kareem and whoever else wanted some. When that team aged, Red put together the Big Three, who beat Magic, Jordan, Hakeem and every other big 80s name.
Never forget that the two players slated to lead the Celtics through the 1990s- Len Bias and Reggie Lewis- died in their 20s. Had they lived, Red just may have dominated another decade.
Basketball isn't football. Yesterday's offensice tackle weighed 180 pounds, about what a burly punter weighs today. Today's NBA ahlete MAY be better conditioned, but 7 feet is 7 feet, babe. Kareem dominated in the 1960s and 80s. So did Red.
Bottom line: Red can slam 2 hands onto the table, with each finger having a championship ring. He can then throw a foot onto the table, with each toe having a ring. Then, Red can either tip over, or slowly undo his pants and lay Ol' # 16 down. The remaining un-ringed toes can be called Reggie, Len, Larry's elbow, Pitino and Ainge.
Jackson can put up 2 hands, with Jordan's help. Jordan can throw one hand down, before sheepishly laying his half-empty second hand down. Kobe would leave the table with his hands in his pockets. Jerry West would know better than to even show.
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