Thursday, January 24, 2008

Poised To Strike, Like Constantly

 

Two weeks (or half of a moon cycle, for all our casino-developing friends) to kill before the big Bowl of Soup!

It's tempting to just start lashing out at that big sewer 270 miles to our southwest. They're loud, ugly, dangerous, and deserve whatever we do to them. My 9/11 sympathy for La Grande Pomme evaporated during the 2003 ALCS.

There's other stuff going on. The Bruins win more than they lose, and have the upper hand in the battle for the final playoff spot. The Celtics have 7 losses this year...at the exact same time last year, they were losing 18 straight. They have not-one-but-TWO legitimate MVP candidates. The BC hoop squad trails only Duke and UNC in the ACC.

But for two weeks, the focus will be football.

I just may ease into it. Hating the Rotten Apple.... hatred in general... is not a sprint, but is rather an endurance event. You don't want to blow yourself out too early, because it weakens your ability to Hate at the time when Hatred is most needed.

Most non-sociopaths sort of cycle between relatively apathetic like and dislike. Sports fans act in more pathological ways. I could probably joke about a Giants-specific Ebola outbreak, maybe 4 seconds after the news came to me. If someone told me that Plaxico Burress just broke his leg rescuing orphans and puppies from a terrorist, I'd be like "Sweet!"... then I'd immediately call the bookie.

Someone as disturbed as myself- and there are perhaps hundreds of thousands of us just in Massachusetts alone- stands a very real chance of exhausting the Hatred too early. You end up cycling out of the Hatred and saying things like "Wow... Manning sure has made great strides this year." You soften.

We won't fall for that kind of stuff here. That's why we're just explaining our modus operandi, so that readers won't think we've lost our edge.

Coming soon....

- The Manning Curse Explained

- NFC= Junior Varsity

- Why New York Deserved The Cloverfield Monster Rampage

- You Don't Put Tomato In Clam Chowder, Morons

- The Wonderful Eccentricities Of  Tom Coughlin (you'll think these are all fake, but some of them will be true... I may actually make a game out of the idea)

- Silliest Names Of Giant Players

- Video Coverage

- Point Spread Analysis

... you know... the whole 9.

As for today.... just a few minor matters of interest:

Random YouTube Magic: P.K. & the Kid - FanHouse - AOL Sports Blog... the Boss is also nationally known. Check the shot-calling aimed at Monponsett in this piece from AOL Fanhouse.

Tales of Game's Studios Presents Chef Boyardee's Barkley Shut Up and Jam: Gaiden...former NBA star Charles Barkley has a new video game out, dealing with the B-Ballnacht, an oppression of ballers following the Chaos Jam of 2041 AD that killed 15 million New Yorkers. Look closely, and you'll see CB talking some ship to Larry Legend.

YouTube - Falmouth Girls Hockey vs Barnstable.... Getting chilly on ice with two local squads of muckersand grinders....

Cape Cod Frenzy... our local ABA franchise is sitting out the 2007-2008 season, because they want a permanent venue. They want the  Hyannis Recreation Facility currently being built on the old JFK rink, and they deserve it. Also, logging onto that page hooks you up with the only Cape Cod rap song ever made.

Peep the sweet logo!

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

That is a nice basketball logo. I'm on my way to check out your piece on aol.
Gem :-)

Anonymous said...

AKA the worst movie ever made..LOL!
Gem :-D

Anonymous said...

I love this time of the year! Super Bowl parties... and my brother-in-law makes the best Chilli for Super Bowl night! Whew, you wanna talk about a footbal fan... he is one from the pits of hell!! LOl... A bottle of beer flew past my head one year because his team wasn't winning lol.... Oh and my real brother, he is such a Cowboys fan, he named his son Dallas! lol.. Have a great night. -Missy