Rooting for both quarterbacks to be injured...

One good thing about the Patriots not being in the Super Bowl is that it brought an end to the Colonel's experiment.

Our border collie- Sloppy Dog- has an unusual bark. She doesn't "woof," she goes "woo woo woo." Much like the parrot, she will attempt to mimic speech if properly riled up.

So... after the San Diego game.... the Colonel came upon the idea of trying to teach her to say "Soooooper Bowl." I'm not kidding. He then sat there with the dog on all fours, getting it to go "woo woo woo," then trying to lead it into saying "Soooooooooper Bowl."

I tried to inform him that one requires lips to make the B sound in "Bowl," and that the dog simply isn't genetically equipped to do so.... but by the time I mounted this argument, he already had the children in on the game, and I was outnumbered.

It's not often that I'm the sane one in the house. There was nothing else to do but go down to my easy chair in the cellar play room, kick back and twist one. Through the fog rising towards the ceiling, I could hear traces of the Colonel's basso profundo voice, extended into a Scoobyesque howl... "Soooooooooooper Bowl." I wanted to cry, but I was laughing too hard.

Anywho... it all sort of worked itself out in Indianapolis the next week, and he's dropped the experiment until next season. Which leads us to the meat of today's article. ..What's gonna happen in today's big game?

Chicago was involved in the first Super Bowl that I was really worked up for... that 46-10 curb-stomping they laid on the heads of our own New England Patriots. I may have been 9 years old, and I was all about the Pats- who, at the time, wore this pissa fire engie red jersey that I already had like 4 of...Hannah, Grogan, Clayborn and Morgan.

I like to tell people "It was 3-0, Patriots when I was sent to bed," but that isn't true. I saw enough to know that the Patriots ran into a buzzsaw that sad evening in 1986, and the meat flew for about 15 years. Amazingly, I don't resent Chicago for this, as even 9 year  old me knew that the 85 Bears were one of a kind, and that the Patriots were lucky to be on the field that day... if "lucky" means "were the ones who got to absorb that for-posterity drubbing."

The Super Bowl can be viewed as a rabid fan, or as a totally disinterested spectator. My friend Tammy once asked me "Why doesn't he (whoever had the ball was always the same guy to Tammy) take the ball and just run behind everyone on the sidelines?.... You wouldn't even SEE him among all those huge people, let alone catch him." She also asked me why he "doesn't just run the other way... I mean, they all know he's gonna go forward... he should go towards the other end zone."

On the other hand, my husband and I frequently bet on things like the coin flip or the outcome of the You Make The Call commercial segments. I have $25 on Rex Grossman being injured today. The last time I tried to do a push-up was when I lost a bet over whether the Jets would run or pass coming out of a timeout. The stakes were 20 push-ups, and I believe I still owe him 7 of them.

There was a separate bet about whether or not I could do 20 pushups in a row... but that involves my man Phillip Atio, and this is a family paper.

 How would I bet today's game?

It's a great matchup... Power vs Finesse, Offense vs Defense, Old School vs High Tech, Huge City vs Big Country, Spy vs Spy,etc... Indianapolis has a high-powered offense,while Chicago has a smashmouth defense. The irresistible force is headed towards the immovable object, and something's got to give.

Logic tells me that Indianapolis will win in a rout. Indy was able to do 30+ on the Patriots, who whaled on this same Bears team like Humpback. Simply stated... Indianapolis will stretch that defense until it breaks... and once it breaks, the points will roll over it like water over a Chocolate City levee.

 Viewed in this light... the Patriots/Colts game of two weeks ago was the de facto Super Bowl, as either of us would have beaten this proud-but-outmatched Bears team. The Patriots lost in the last minute, and things could have ended quite differently if Brady had anyone with talent to throw that ball to on the final drive.

That makes an Indianapolis victory palatable to me, and I won'tbe all grouchy watching it happen. I'm rooting for the Bears, though.

The Bears are a classic team.They run better than they throw, although they've tweaked the passing game enough to have put 35+ up on a few teams this year. Much like the Patriots, they were constructed defense-first, with extra attention paid to the defensive line. They go out on the field with the expressed purpose of beating the s*** out of the other team, which is what I like to see in my Colts opponents.

So,when the fur flies today,someone is going to suffer. Something crazy may happen, like a Fumblerooski or a streaker tackling Joseph Addai as he scampers for what would have been the game-tying touchdown in the final seconds.

You can't see stuff like that coming,  so you have to bet what you know. All I know is that I've seen Peyton Manning choke too much to put a plug nickel on him in a game of any sort of consequence....and the consquences don't get any bigger than a Super Bowl. The Colts also deserve to lose for not still being in Baltimore. Look for them both to get punished.

Bears, 21-20, with Adam V shanking one to lose the game after the streaker-related loss of the game-breaking touchdown.

Weekend Assignment #150 (or, CL): Your First Super Bowl

Tags: Super Bowl, Cape Cod, Colts, Bears, 1986 Super Bowl, Patriots, Grossman injured, Peyton Manning choker