Monday, June 27, 2005

Travellin' Smurf

We're setting up the new house, and doing a bit of vacationing while the carpenters make the place baby-ready.

I haven't seen a sporting event longer than an inning since May. I saw exactly 0 minutes of Detroit/San Antonio, a series I was looking forward to since last August.

I did see the Tyson fight "highlights" on the news. Nature abhors a vacuum, so she must be hating on boxing right now. There is no Bad Guy out there, and boxing is a sport that wants- no, needs- someone fearsome. John Ruiz (who I have met, and found to be a nice guy) has the appeal of a road accident. Roy keeps getting tomato canned, and James Toney needs to Bonds up in order to make weight.

If I was a young heavyweight of any sort of ability, I'd be making a serious effort to get into trouble. I'd hire women to loudly proclaim (and quietly drop) charges that I either raped, robbed, or impregnated them. I'd openly smoke crack at press conferences. I'd hire someone like me to author outrageous statements that could be lobbed to ESPN on slow news days.

- "I like sodomizing the elderly."

- "I could take over the crack trade in Cleveland for thie money I make for beating these jokers."

- "I think that more women like to be punched in the face after sex than the American media lets on."

- "I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize."

- "If the Academy Awards were awarded to men with enormous genitals, I'd be Sean F***ing Connery."

I forget who wrote it, but the man who wishes for fame can become infamous. We could all wish for a million dollars, but we wouldn't want it if it were, say, a Wrongful Death settlement involving an only son. Being on a Wanted poster sort of counts as being famous, but the consequences often outweigh the benefits.

One of the few exceptions is Boxing. Mike Tyson- a common thug with (in 1987) uncommon skills. But at least 5 times in the last ten years, someone has knocked Iron Mike smooth the f*** out.  Mike is more famous than everyone who has knocked him out- even all time great Evander Holyfield. Sometimes, it is better to be famous than it is to be proficient.

Mike Tyson can make more money defending himself from Miss Rhode Island's rape charges than John Ruiz can make defending the heavyweight title for 10 years. Sure it's wrong, but money makes its' own rules, and it cares little for Commandments and Decrees.

Memories fade, but financial security can last for generations. I'm sure Roberto Duran can walk around without being recognized. Remember Michel Fowler? No one else does, either....but he was the middleweight champ in 1959. What do you want to bet that he gets a couple of hundred grand in speaking engagements a year? I bet he'd have to pay people just to listen to him.



geefred53 said...

lol, good blog. Welcome back Stacey or is that premature?

cneinhorn said...

baby ready?  did I miss something?  a baby is on the way ?  

monponsett said...

No pregnancies, yet. Melissa is almost a year old(Gabby is a more worldly 3), and we need to do things like putting locks on cabinets, lattice on the porch, and so forth. I still haven't installed the computer in my new office (I made a rather poor decision when we were packing....I just disconnected wires, and have no idea how to put them back....I have a friend who does this stuff for me, but she moved to South Carolina), and have been checking mail at the library and the hotel we are staying at.

ohiosportstalk said...

that was an excellent post.  

You are on point as being financially secure is the only true recognition in the world of boxing.  It's sad we have to rip into flesh to grab the public's attention, and I think this is a sport which will be hard to repair.  But as you said..screw repairing's not gonna happen.  some crazy idiot needs to take that next step.  and your comments (which were amazing and hopefully the kids weren't reading)...yea i think those comments will grab the public's eye.  

zbar88 said...

HAve FuN!